So, people don't really read my blog right? Not a lot of people anyways. Let me tell you about my night then. It was wonderful, for the most part. The game was a good one, even though we lost. I got to hang out with fun people, which is fun. And Nathan, sweet, cute, adorable, little Nathan, texted me all night... But of course... I went to IHOP and who shows up after his the concert that he didn't invite me to? Bryce. It's not bad enough that he was there, filling up the limelight and making everyone happy, including me. He was also talked about the entire night by the group of guys I was with. They kept raving about how cool he was and how much they all loved him. Truth is, I still love him too. Continuing, the guy who drove him to the concert was baked, absolutly cooked to a crisp. So, being the good person that I am, I said yes when he asked me to drive him home. Nothing happened. Of course nothing happened. Well, that's not entirely true. Do you want to know what happened? I was reminded of why I let myself secretly give him my heart. All the emotions and feelings and desires and longings and pure love I have for that kid, surfaced. He thanked me a billion times for being the best, and then he climbed out of the car, and then I drove home, by myself, crying, at two in the morning. Sob sob sob, rachel. Go ahead and feel sorry for yourself, you little high school drama queen. You know what? I will, thank you very much. I don't really care that I'm just in high school. That's completely irrelevant. I don't really care that everyone thinks I shouldn't place this much weight on him or an ended relationship. Because I do, and that's not really by choice. I just do. I cannot help how I feel or act or am.
I am shreaded, quite honestly, and I have no clue where to go from here...
Sleep sweet, gentle reader.
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